It’s Time To Face The Infertility Music

Some couples have dreams of starting or growing a family with a healthy baby. After months or even years of trying to conceive, couples may decide to visit a doctor for advice. In 15% of cases, the couple is indeed infertile. This news can be devastating and stressful. Handling bad news of this nature is not for the faint of heart. The best and only step is to communicate quickly and directly with partners and loved ones. Discussing the infertility diagnosis can help address many of the emotional challenges that will come and decide the best course of action.

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Infertility in a nutshell

Infertility occurs when there is difficulty getting pregnant naturally after consistently trying for at least 12 months. Couples without children who are infertile are known to have primary infertility. Those with children trying to get pregnant again without success have secondary infertility. The reasons for infertility are equally distributed between men and women. Some cases are unexplained, with no apparent reason for the condition. Infertility can be a hormonal issue, physical condition, or reproductive challenge. Age, lifestyle factors, and certain diseases can also impact fertility. Despite the resources and treatments available today, one cannot overlook the emotional toll infertility can have on couples and families.

Communicating with your partner

Infertility can bring up a range of emotions and issues that must be addressed through open communication. The discourse should start between the couple directly impacted by this diagnosis. The couple must address the fear, shame, and isolation that come with infertility. There must be honesty so both parties can move forward. Both parties must acknowledge and validate feelings and emotions without judgment. There may be resentment if the issue can be traced to a particular individual, and this must be acknowledged openly. Couples should reassure each other of support, love, and empathy while discussing the next steps.

Creating the action plan

Open communication, active listening, and care can help couples come to an understanding, even if there are differences in facing the diagnosis. These conversations should happen in a calm environment that sets the tone for meaningful dialogue. The next step is to create an action plan that both parties agree to pursue. There may be differences in delaying fertility treatment or attempting in vitro fertilization (IVF) strategies. Opinions on surrogacy, adoption, donor material, or other possible treatments can arise in conversation. There are also financial considerations which can place considerable strain on relationships. Spend as much time as possible dissecting these concerns, then come to a compromise.

Setting boundaries with your loved ones

Full communication between the couple is vital before sharing the information with others. Once the couple is on the same page, speaking with others becomes more effortless. More importantly, conversations would not reveal differences in opinions that could have been addressed earlier. Decide on the friends or family members that should know this new information. These conversations with loved ones should have clear boundaries as there tends to be unsolicited advice or intrusive questions if left unchecked. Provide clear ways for family members to help and reassure each person that the focus is on supporting each other as needed. Be direct and firm but kind, especially if giving difficult or improbable advice. Provide the information both parties are comfortable sharing and no more.

Deciding on your next steps

Communication must be followed with the right action based on the physical, emotional, and financial challenges the couple faces. If the couple decides to take action and address infertility, there are options available to increase the chances of conception. The first step is to speak with a fertility specialist who can provide feedback and a strategy for success. This strategy can include IVF, hormone treatment, or a combination of procedures. Surrogacy, donor sperm, donor eggs, and adoption are all on the table. Make the best choice based on family planning goals, finances, resources, and overall needs.

There is power in the tongue

Dealing with infertility brings feelings of anger, stress, isolation, sadness, and resentment. Communicating feelings with partners and sharing relevant information with loved ones can help couples feel supported. Doctors recommend consistent support along with treatment, as feelings can change on the journey. Consider finding infertility groups, leveraging talk therapy, or finding fun stress-relieving activities to enjoy together. Prioritizing open communication is the best way to cope with the emotional challenges to come while strengthening the relationship.